Stay Sane in an Insane World

 

Issue No. 575 of Your Weekly Staff Meeting (Sept. 6, 2023) features a WSJ bestselling book with 37 powerful topics for your next 37 weekly staff meetings. And this reminder: click here to download free resources from the 20 management buckets (core competencies). View this 60 Minutes snippet (2014) featuring sports legend James Brown's interview with Greg Harden, Michigan's Executive Director of Athletic Counseling. Click here to view the 4-minute video and learn why Brown snagged a copy of Harden's syllabus on self-defeating attitudes!   37 Powerful Coaching Topics! Apparently, my new hobby is editing book titles—and suggesting to authors and publishers several alternative attention-grabbing titles. (Where would that place me on the chutzpah scoreboard?) So here is this week’s book—already a Wall Street Journal bestseller: Stay Sane in an Insane World: How to Control the Controllables and Thrive by Greg Harden To be clear, I absolutely love this book. I can’t stop talking about it. It’s already on my Top-10 List of 2023 books. But, if the publisher had asked me to suggest book titles, I might have suggested these zingers from Chapters 18, 21, 22, and 30:    • It’s Perfectly Okay Not to Be Perfect!    • You Only Get One-Tenth of a Second to Feel Bad!     • 37 Powerful Topics for One-on-One Coaching    • SWOT Yourself!    • Say Thank You (And Then Shut Your Mouth!) With 37 short chapters, this is a no-brainer resource for the next 37 weeks of your weekly staff meetings. I couldn’t find any fluff in any of the 37 relevant topics. Your coworkers and direct reports will love this book too. Greg Harden’s insights will enrich your leadership and your one-on-one coaching. (If you’re a wanna-be author, you’ll borrow the book’s brilliant format.) Greg Harden writes, “I can’t teach Tom Brady how to throw the ball. I can’t teach Desmond Howard how to catch the ball. I can’t teach Michael Phelps how to do a perfect flip turn. All I can do is teach you how to become the world’s greatest expert on one subject: yourself.” “If you train yourself to give 100 percent, 100 percent of the time, to the stuff you hate, how phenomenal are you going to be when you get to the stuff you love?” He adds, “The greatest competition you’re ever going to face is yourself.” For more than 30 years, Greg Harden has built champions as Executive Director of Athletic Counseling at the University of Michigan. (See his 60 Minutes interview with sportscaster James Brown who called Harden “Michigan’s Secret Weapon.”) In addition to inspiring Tom Brady, Desmond Howard, Charles Woodson, and others, he has counseled over 400 other student athletes who have gone on to professional careers in four major sports. But…you’re not an athlete? No problem. This book on “How to Control the Controllables and Thrive” will become your go-to resource for your own gut-checks and for inspiring family, friends, and co-workers to step up.  By the way, did you know that Tom Brady (who wrote the book’s foreword) was not drafted by the New England Patriots until the NFL’s sixth round? (He was the 199th pick!) Yet, in his 23 seasons in the NFL, Brady won a record seven Super Bowl titles, three NFL MVP awards, and a record five Super Bowl MVPs. The author’s commentary on Brady is noteworthy. He came to Harden’s office for help. He writes, “This may be the perfect spot to let you know that athletes who have asked for help tend to have better outcomes than those who are required to meet with me.” Here are 7 memorable principles from this extraordinary book: #1. There Is No “Geographical Cure.” Heisman winner Desmond Howard had been at the University of Michigan for a year and half and his football dreams were not coming true. Harden notes, “Desmond was starting to think that maybe it was time for the old ‘geographical cure.’ You know, the belief that if you go to another team (or another place to work, another city to live in), everything will suddenly turn out right. Even though you’ve changed nothing else about yourself, just packing up and moving will somehow magically fix everything.” #2. The Value of a Short Memory. Harden hammers home his “one-tenth of a second” principle. “It’s the one trait so many of the greatest athletes I’ve ever known have in common: a short memory. My shot doesn’t go in. I drop the ball. I miss the wide-open net. I give myself one-tenth of a second to feel bad, and then I keep playing.” He adds, “It works the other way, too. The ball goes in, I catch the pass, I score the goal. Now I’ve got one-tenth of a second to feel great about it before I get back to the game.” Harden says that to become a peak performer, “you have to retrain, reprogram, re-engineer yourself not to obsess over ‘triumph and disaster’ (to quote Rudyard Kipling) to ‘treat those two impostors just the same.’” Learn the essence of author Greg Harden's coaching process by listening to Tom Brady (the NFL's G.O.A.T.) describe Harden's approach with him at the University of Michigan. Click here to view this 7-minute NFL Film (2016), "Inside the Mind of Tom Brady." #3. Say Thank You (And Then Shut Your Mouth!). The author observes, “…to this day, I am amazed at the general human inability to accept a compliment. In fact, I’ve noticed that the better you are at giving compliments to others, the worse you are at accepting them for yourself.” This is great advice! I tried it last week when Amazon’s Alexa asked if I wanted to reorder my favorite oatmeal.    • Me: “Yes! Thank you!”    • Alexa: “You’re so welcome. Your kindness really gives me a charge!”    • Me: (I shut up as Greg Harden urges! LOL!)   #4. Beware the Common Denominator of Your Bad Bosses! The book includes two jammed-packed chapters on interviewing: Chapter 33, “When You’re Interviewing Someone, Let Them Tell You Who They Are,” and Chapter 34, “When You’re Being Interviewed, Turn It Around!” Harden lists his best interviewing techniques: “panel interviews, role-plays, small group discussions, behavioral interviews, and formal presentations. In each of these formats, you’re creating a more dynamic, real-life scenario, and you can discover a great deal more about your candidates.” When you’re interviewing for a position, Harden warns not to come across as the person who’s been cursed by a series of bosses who are jerks. “…I guarantee you, you just lost the job—because the common denominator in all of your bad situations was you.” #5. If You Don’t Golf, Skip Chapter 35! The humor oozes out of dozens of chapters, especially Chapter 35: “If You Happen to Be a Golfer…then may God have mercy on your soul. Also keep reading. If you don’t golf, be thankful and skip this chapter.” (But really, don’t skip this chapter.) Harden notes, “Of all the sports I’ve ever played, I think golf may be the best metaphor for life.” This reminded me of the golf books I’ve reviewed, including this 2023 bestseller, Feherty: The Remarkably Funny and Tragic Journey of Golf's David Feherty, by John Feinstein. Greg Harden began his career as a clinical therapist at a drug and alcohol rehabilitation center. I wonder if Feherty would have avoided his numerous missteps if he had met Greg Harden early on. #6. “I Had to Forgive My Father for Not Being Perfect.” Whew! Harden is very transparent and you’ll appreciate Chapter 7, “The Demon on the Left Shoulder (Self-Defeating Attitudes and Behaviors)” and Chapter 8, “The Angel on Your Right Shoulder (Self-Supporting Attitudes and Behaviors).” You’ll reference these chapters frequently. Harden muses, “Why can’t I give up fear and self-doubt for Lent?” His insights on “letting go of yesterday’s baggage” (his assignment and exercise for a volleyball player) are powerful. He quotes Eleanor Roosevelt: “No one can make you feel inferior  without your permission.” Chapter 7 includes a convicting list of 29 self-defeating attitudes and behaviors that popped out during his workshops, including: blaming others, being revengeful, spreading rumors, being arrogant, and not sharing your true feelings. He adds a 30th behavior: addiction.  #7. Three Specific Things I Will STOP Doing. A two-page worksheet, “My Purpose, My Goals, My SDABs and SSABs,” features a helpful tool for coaching and mentoring and includes these fill-in-the-blanks prompts: • My Purpose in Life (50 words or less) • What would success look like for me? • My Goals (measurable, actionable goals that will show progress toward success) • Self-defeating attitudes and behaviors (SDABs) holding me back from reaching my goals (list 3)    --Three specific things I will STOP doing • Self-supporting attitudes and behaviors (SSABs) that I want to cultivate in my life (list 3)    --Three specific things I will START doing THERE’S MORE. I gotta stop here, but don’t miss these highlights:    • Public Speaking: Why you should memorize the first two minutes of your talk.    • 11 Testimonials: Powerful “testimonials” from 11 men and women, including Desmond Howard and Steve Hamilton.     • Two Exercises: When counseling a very unhappy volleyball player, how two exercises helped her bounce back.    • Faith-based, Solution-focused: The poignant song, Agape, written and sung by pro hockey player Cooper Marody as a memorial to his teammate, Colby Cave. Note: Kleenex alert! (Read why the author admires Marody's lifestyle: "faith-based, solution-focused.")    • SWOT Worksheet: How to conduct your own self-assessment on Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities, and Threats.    • Chapter 7: Why Harden thought of titling this chapter, “The Funnest Damn Chapter in the Whole Book!” To order from Amazon, click on the title for Stay Sane in an Insane World: How to Control the Controllables and Thrive, by Greg Harden with Steve Hamilton. Listen on Libro (5 hours, 39 minutes). And thanks to the publisher for sending me a review copy. 2026 Update: Greg Harden (1949-2024) was honored by the University of Michigan and numerous athletes in this special tribute. YOUR WEEKLY STAFF MEETING QUESTIONS: 1) Greg Harden writes, “If you make it your mindset, your vision of who you are, that you’re going to make it a habit to give 100 percent, 100 percent of the time, in everything you do—if you make that your norm, your base level, your default mode—then on your absolutely worst day, even when you slip, you’re still going to be better than the average person on their BEST day.” What would it look like for you to give 100 percent, 100 percent of the time—in your current role at work? 2) And speaking of worst days, here's my review of John Lynch's classic, On My Worst Day: Cheesecake, Evil, Sandy Koufax and Jesus.        Mastering 100 Must-Read Books Part 7: Contrarian Thinkers Book #45 of 100: Balancing Life's Demands For your team meeting this week, inspire a team member to lead your “10 Minutes for Lifelong Learning” session by featuring Book #45 in Mastering 100 Must-Read Books.  Balancing Life's Demands:  A New Perspective on Priorities by J. Grant Howard Books #41 through #45 spotlight five unique authors I’ve labeled “Contrarian Thinkers.” Most books, and far too many preachers, will give you the well-worn dribble about balancing priorities: God is first. Family is second. Church is third. Your career is fourth. Bible scholar J. Grant Howard disagreed and wrote that a list of sequential priorities makes absolutely no sense.     • Read my review.    • Order from Amazon: Balancing Life's Demands    • Download the 100 Must-Read Books list (from John and Jason Pearson). Dr. Howard (1929-2004) wrote, “It can’t be intelligently explained. It can’t be easily understood. It can’t be logically lived out.” He added, “I am convinced that the existing sequential model is not only impractical it is unbiblical.” Instead, Howard believed that Matthew 22:34-40 says we have two relationships and responsibilities—equal in importance—God and our neighbor. With God at the center circle of his helpful diagram, a second circle of self surrounds God and then a third circle with five segments—work, world, government, church and family—make up the outer concentric circle.  “The Bible simply does not present the Christian’s commitments on some scale or list,” wrote Howard. “It does not give them to us as sequential priorities. We don’t do them all at the same time (though there are many areas of overlap), but we need to do them all.”                      PEARPOD | TELLING YOUR STORY. Chapter 13 in Greg Harden’s book is a must-read: “Your Sport Is What You Do, Not Who You Are.” As you market and promote your organization’s visionary leaders—what role do you have in ensuring that your leaders are living healthy God-honoring lives? Reminder: “Your mission is what you do—not who you are.” Need ideas? Contact Jason Pearson at Pearpod (Design, Digital, Marketing, Social). MORE RESOURCES: • BLOG: Pails in Comparison • SUBSCRIBE: Your Weekly Staff Meeting eNews • JOHN'S BOOK REVIEWS: on Amazon  • WEBSITE:   Management Buckets • BLOG: Governance of Christ-Centered Organizations IMPORTANT NOTICE! Effective Oct. 1, 2025, all 657 eNews issues, previously archived on Typepad.com are slowly (!) being moved to a new website here. New book reviews will also be archived at John Pearson’s Buckets Blog. Or, click here for John’s recent book reviews on Amazon. Legendary Football Coaches on Culture Some books inspire, but leave out the critical steps. Matt Mayberry’s book inspires and delivers insights and implementation plans, plus helpful profiles on legendary football coaches and leadership gurus. He also warns about “Six Helpful Pain Points.” Must-read: Pain Point #2, “Misrepresentation of old mindsets and behaviors.” Read my review of Culture Is the Way: How Leaders at Every Level Build an Organization for Speed, Impact, and Excellence.

Decision Sprint

 

Issue No. 566 of Your Weekly Staff Meeting (June 28, 2023) features a graduate-level baptism in decision-making. Was your last meeting an input meeting or an output meeting? And this reminder: click here to download free resources from the 20 management buckets (core competencies). “The start or any new phase of a project is characterized by unknowns,” writes the author of Decision Sprint. “They are like puzzle pieces when you first open the box. Plentiful and unclear how they all relate.” Perhaps like The Clearly Impossible Puzzle with 1000 clear pieces (and no colors)!   “Caught in a Cycle of Inertia” Raise your hand if your job and/or personal life involves making numerous decisions. (I see those hands!) Now raise your hand if you’ve ever read a book, attended a seminar, or listened to a podcast or TED talk on effective decision-making. (Hmmm.) Confession! After college, I had been a decision-making zealot (or so I thought) for almost 20 years before I attended Steve Holbrook’s “Effective Decision-Making” course. Embarrassing! (I’m still so grateful for Bob Kobielush’s vision for what we called the Leadership Development Institute back in our CCI/USA days.) How about you? Ready for a graduate-level baptism into the art and science of decision-making? It’s here, thanks to Atif Rafiq: Decision Sprint:  The New Way to Innovate into the Unknown  and Move from Strategy to Action   Last week, over at the Pails in Comparison blog, I gave you a sneak peek and promised that Decision Sprint will revolutionize your meetings (and more). How important is this book? I underlined nearly every sentence in the first four pages. ================================= LOL! 4 Reviews of this book! Review #1: Pails in Comparison Blog #45A. Review #2: AI-Generated "Traditional Review" Review #3: AI-Generated "LOL!" Review!" Review #4: Right here. Keep reading! ================================= Atif Rafiq was the first Chief Digital Officer in the history of the Fortune 500. After serving at Amazon, he became McDonald's first CDO. (One problem: “When I arrived, we counted no fewer than 25 apps for McDonald’s in the US app store.”) He describes his first executive project briefing. He was at the head of the table—conscious of first impressions—with about 30 people. Another problem: “We were heavily resourced, yet everyone was operating in silos.” RAFIQ’S CONFESSION! “Reflecting on that first meeting, I had one regret. A single question I could have asked would have changed the entire tenor. A question that would challenge people to think differently and begin to shift the norms of the company: “Is this an input meeting or an output meeting?” Yikes! Like you just now, I wandered back through hundreds of meetings in my mind—wondering, were those input meetings or output meetings? Yikes, again. Decision Sprint will be your new go-to resource for improving meetings and clarifying issues. (Oh, my. I could have used these insights every day. But even the author notes that it took him 10 years to wrestle these concepts into this book. Refreshing!) I’m calling this review, “Part 2 of 2,” because I labeled my sneak peek, “Part 1 of 2.” In that blog post I asked five questions and threatened to list 44 more—and not give answers—so you’ll actually do the hard work of relearning and rethinking decision-making. My fifth question bears repeating: #5. SMILE. The former president and CEO of Volvo Cars says that “Asking why with a smile five times is very efficient.” Why? After McDonald’s, Rafiq became Chief Digital Officer and global CIO at Volvo. He notes, “I had never run an IT department before, yet Hakan [Volvo’s CEO] gave me 1,500 IT people to manage.” (Not a typo!) I think that may have involved a higher level of decision- making! Yikes. Anyway…here goes. I’ll pose a few more questions if you’ll read the book and deliver the answers? Fair? #6. NO TITLES. Why did Volvo “do away with titles and replace them with what each executive believed was their main contribution” to the company? #7. CLARITY. At the time, Volvo’s executive management team replaced their job titles with “a variety of pithy descriptions.” The CEO’s new title: “clarity of thought.” What other Fortune 500 CEO believed that was his main job? #8. MBO. In a fascinating five-page Q&A between the author and Hakan Samuelsson, now former president and CEO of Volvo Cars, Hakan says, “I don’t like management by objectives.” (A famous guru said, “Management by objective works—if you know the objectives. Ninety percent of the time you do not.” Who said that and who invented MBO?) #9. DIFFERENT PLANETS! At McDonald’s, the author immediately observed that working at Amazon was akin to living on one planet, yet McDonald’s was on another planet! “There was no language to connect the planets.” Finally, over the next 10 years, Rafiq “developed the language, words, and methods to connect the planets: “Upstream” and “Downstream.” How would you define “upstream work” and “downstream work”—and where should senior leaders engage? (See the chart on page 25—another bullseye for my “Page 25 Takeways” rule of thumb.) #10. AI MANAGEMENT. Part Four of Decision Sprint (48 pages) “will stretch your thinking on the future of management and the role of artificial intelligence (AI), once companies and teams are working effectively upstream.” (See Chapters 12-14: “Digital Tools,” “AI as Mission Control,” and “The Upstream CEO.” Gut check! “Grammatical errors are fixed as you type. Can we leverage this concept into the world of management?”) Atif Rafiq writes about “Management Fueled by AI” including “AI as Error Correction.” Decision Sprint is a must-read! (Read The Experience Mindset to learn why a robot may be CEO of the Year in 2050!) AI BOOK REVIEW NO. 2. And just for grins—thinking about artificial intelligence—I asked AI, “Write a book review of ‘Decision Sprint’ by Atif Rafiq.” In the blink of a robot, ChatGPT delivered an insightful 517-word response. (Read it here.) LOL! AI BOOK REVIEW NO. 3. And for more fun, I then asked AI, “Using the writing style and humor from 'John Pearson’s Buckets Blog,' write a book review of 'Decision Sprint' by Atif Rafiq." This time, ChatGPT thought it was auditioning for a standup comedy gig! Click here to enjoy the 545-word over-the-top parody of my writing style! LOL! (AI rated the book “5/5 Buckets!” Love it!) I could have easily Pop Quizzed you with another 39 questions, but then you’d miss the joy of the journey. Watch for: • “The work of management will be transformed in a way that would make Peter Drucker roll in the grave.” • The three components of Decision Sprint: “exploration, alignment, and decision-making” and why exploration (asking questions) is so critical.  • The 13 workflows (brilliant!) including: 1) Initiating an Exploration, 3) Sourcing Questions, 13) Conducting Decision Meetings. • Could the author have done more at Mickey D’s? “Could McDonald’s have become Uber Eats before there was one?” • Why spontaneous interaction might be more productive than scheduled meetings. “It’s very difficult to be creative at an 8:00 in the morning meeting.” • Why “questions are critical.” (This reminded me of my 2020 book-of-the-year, The Advice Trap. The author just released his latest book this week, How to Work With (Almost) Anyone. Watch for my review.) • Why publishers were caught flat-footed and “ceded total dominance of e-books to Amazon.” Post this on your office wall: “They were likely caught in a cycle of inertia.” OK, you’ve been warned! Will your next meeting be about inputs or outputs? Are you working upstream or downstream? Why? Of the five elements of a workflow (participation, purpose, inputs, outputs, and format)—what did you miss in your last meeting? Who should read this book first? To order from Amazon, click on the title for Decision Sprint: The New Way to Innovate into the Unknown and Move from Strategy to Action, by Atif Rafiq. Listen on Libro (available July 11, 2023). And thanks to the author for sending me a review copy.   P.S. BONUS PODCAST! Click here to listen to Tiffani Bova's podcast interview with Atif Rafiq about his new book. (Bova is the author of The Experience Mindset. Read my review.) YOUR WEEKLY STAFF MEETING QUESTIONS: 1) In Chapter 9, “Hack Today’s System,” the author of Decision Sprint writes: “My promise is there will be fewer and more effective meetings for everyone at all levels.” Pipe dream? Or could reading this book enrich our decision-making and our meetings? What might be the ROI of a meeting audit? 2) When, where, and how often should senior executives jump into the decision-making progress? First, read Decision Sprint. Then, communicate your style. While tossing old files last week, I ran across an inter-office memo template from 1999 that I titled, “Hands Off Memo From J.P.” It read: Okay…here’s the deal.  You get a dollar every time you think I’m being too “hands on” and you want me to be “hands off.” I get a dollar every time you ask me to be “hands on” and I want to be “hands off!” (Billings at month end!)        Mastering 100 Must-Read Books Part 6: The Mount Rushmore of Leadership Legends (Peter Drucker) Book #37 of 100: The Daily Drucker For your team meeting this week, inspire a team member to lead your “10 Minutes for Lifelong Learning” session by featuring Book #37 in Mastering 100 Must-Read Books.    The Daily Drucker:  366 Days of Insight and Motivation for Getting the Right Things Done by Peter F. Drucker with Joseph A. Maciariello Books #22 through #40 spotlight 19 books I named to “The Mount Rushmore of Leadership Legends” group—featuring Patrick Lencioni, Jim Collins, Ken Blanchard, and Peter Drucker. Part 6 features five books by/about Drucker, including this book with daily management morsels such as, “People who don't take risks generally make about two big mistakes a year. People who do take risks generally make about two big mistakes a year.”    • Order from Amazon: The Daily Drucker    • Download the 100 Must-Read Books list (from John and Jason Pearson). With 366 daily doses of Drucker, each page includes a memorable “Action Point.” On April 11, “The Four Competencies of a Leader,” Drucker summarizes the sermonette from his one-year management bible with this: “Set aside ten minutes every Friday afternoon to give yourself a weekly report card on all four skills:     • Listening    • Communicating    • Reengineering mistakes, and    • Subordinating your ego to the task at hand.”                      PEARPOD | TELLING YOUR STORY. Stumped on the appropriate (and legal) use of artificial intelligence (AI) at your organization? Your storytelling will be enriched—and your graphic designers will save time and money—if you leverage AI effectively. (See this WSJ article, “The Best AI Apps to Try Now.”) We’re using it right now. For help, contact Jason Pearson at Pearpod (Design, Digital, Marketing, Social). Boards Asleep at the Wheel! There are three times, especially, when “boards fall asleep at the wheel,” as Dan Busby and I wrote in More Lessons From the Nonprofit Boardroom: Effectiveness, Excellence, Elephants! Watch for: 1) Misreading the landscape, 2) Inability to see the forest for the trees, and 3) Becoming mired in the weeds. Read Lesson 36 here. Read the blog by Steve Altick. Order the book.  MORE RESOURCES: • BLOG: Pails in Comparison • SUBSCRIBE: Your Weekly Staff Meeting eNews • JOHN'S BOOK REVIEWS: on Amazon  • WEBSITE:   Management Buckets • BLOG: Governance of Christ-Centered Organizations AI Writes Lyrics in 3 Seconds! The authors of The Future Normal asked AI to change the lyrics to a song. “The lyrics ... came back in three seconds. No human, not even the world’s best songwriters, could produce something this quickly. And most people would agree that the lyrics are distinctly passable.” Whew! Another must-read: The Future Normal: How We Will Live, Work and Thrive in the Next Decade, by Rohit Bhargava and Henry Coutinho-Mason.  IMPORTANT NOTICE! Effective Oct. 1, 2025, all 657 eNews issues, previously archived on Typepad.com are slowly (!) being moved to a new website here. New book reviews will also be archived at John Pearson’s Buckets Blog. Or, click here for John’s recent book reviews on Amazon.

Yours Truly: An Obituary Writer's Guide to Telling Your Story

 

Issue No. 564 of Your Weekly Staff Meeting (June 14, 2023) suggests that you and your family members start now to write your own obituaries and/or “life stories”—before someone else writes about a person you won’t recognize! (Happy Father's Day, anyway.) And this reminder: click here to download free resources from the 20 management buckets (core competencies). My son, Jason, jokes that instead of my photo on the screen at my memorial service, he’ll display a QR Code so attenders can order my latest book! LOL!   Happy Father’s Day! Please write your obituary!  In one of the 800 obituaries that James R. Hagerty has written for the Wall Street Journal, his April 16, 2020, piece on Earl Graves (1935-2020) was quite memorable. Graves and his wife launched Black Enterprise magazine and much more—but it was this entrepreneur’s description of his wife that made me laugh. Graves said his wife, Barbara, was “vice president in charge of shutting down the publisher’s bad ideas.”  Obituary? Laugh? Absolutely!  And you’ll laugh often and just maybe—when you’ve read this book—you’ll be inspired to write your own “life story,” a short and sweet obituary or a long and laugh-filled chronicle of what made you tick. If so, James R. Hagerty (“Bob”) has some great insights for you in his wonderful book: Yours Truly:  An Obituary Writer's Guide to Telling Your Story This may be my 2023 book-of-the-year. It’s that good and filled with promise. Just ask my wife, Joanne, who listened to dozens of paragraphs that I read to her last weekend, like these chuckles: Chapter 4—succinctly delivered in two pages—offers “What Not to Include” in your obituary: • Endorsements. “They waste space and weary the reader needlessly.” • Boasts. “Your life story is not a nomination for sainthood.” • Exaggerations. “If you attended a six-week course at Harvard, do not call yourself Harvard-educated.” • The Complete List of Every Public-Service Appointment and Club Membership. (Too bad. I had some very noteworthy leadership roles in third grade!) • Things You’re Not Sure About. “If readers find one error in your story, they may have trouble believing the rest.” • Things That Go Without Saying. “Don’t describe your spouse as loving unless you see a serious risk readers will doubt that.” Really, John? You think everyone should write their own obituary and/or “life story” just because the author wants to sell books on this topic? Full confession—I was skeptical. Not everyone enjoys the writing process or recording their thoughts into an iPhone. But, after reading this gem—absolutely. Write your story! I’m now a fully devoted zealot of the “write-your-own-obituary” club. This truly enjoyable book explains how and why. “Don’t leave it to family members, who are almost certain to make a hash of it.” Hagerty adds, “Don’t let anyone tell you that sharing your story is selfish, a sign of conceit or vanity. It’s an act of generosity.” He quotes poet Jim Harrison, “Death steals everything except our stories.”  The author notes, “This book is for anyone who wants their story to be fair, accurate, interesting, and maybe even inspiring. It explains how to make sure your story is told the way you want—and how thinking about and preparing that story can help you live a better life.” WHY? “…your story is likely to be written in haste by a friend or family member distracted by grief and the many urgent tasks of dealing with a death. And, I’m sorry to inform you, this well-meaning person will probably describe someone you would not recognize.” Writing your story, I’m now convinced, should be on everyone’s bucket list. “Many seem to find it therapeutic.” Reading the wide array of obituary examples in Yours Truly (many people you’ve never heard about) reminded me of more than 20 of my own life events that I had forgotten. I might include them in a longer version of my obituary. (I think my five grandkids and other family members and friends might even read my “bucket” stories.) In between innings at the Angels vs. Cubs baseball game last week (don’t ask who won), I told my son, Jason, about this fascinating book—and how it inspired me to write my obituary. • Me: “Here's an idea, Jason. At my memorial service, you could give everyone a copy of my yet-to-be-written book, John’s Obituary and Bucket Stories.” • Jason: “How about instead of your photo on the screen, I show a QR Code so they can order the book online?” • Me: LOL! Hagerty continues, “No, telling your story is not another irksome task, like making a will or clearing out the attic. Telling your story is less difficult than you may imagine. Telling your story can be amusing. It can pay off in unexpected ways.” As the only fulltime obituary writer for the WSJ, Haggerty suggests you ask yourself three questions:    • What were you trying to do with your life?    • Why?    • And how did it work out? You’ll strike gold as you read Yours Truly. Here are some of the treasures I found. When interviewing a living person to help them write their obituary: • If the answers are too generic, “Ask the same question 10 times in 10 different ways if need be.” (Eventually, the author learned one person had spent time in prison!) • “Bob Greene made a transcript of his father’s recordings so they would not be lost to future generations lacking cassette-tape players.” • “If an obituary can’t be fun, what’s the point of dying.” (Ask me about my favorite LOL memorial service!) This book inspired me to focus on the lead sentence in my obituary—abandoning generic templates and embracing vivid descriptions, such as: • A political cartoonist began his mother’s obituary with this: “Margaret Marilyn DeAdder, professional clipper of coupons, baker of cookies, terror behind the wheel, champion of the underdog, ruthless card player, and…” • “Harold met Jesus at 8:27 a.m. Wednesday, Oct. 16, 2019.” (Hagerty comments, “The specificity of this statement suggests to me that morning is a good time to die because, apparently, there is no line at the pearly gates at that hour.”) • The author gives us permission to use whatever verb or euphemism we prefer to describe our exit. “After all, it’s your obituary.” He lists options and I found my favorite: “John W. Pearson kicked the bucket on…” MODELS & MISFITS. Hagerty includes stunning examples of obituaries in Part Two, “Models and Misfits,” with profiles of heroes, characters, and more: • Harvard Business School’s Clayton Christensen (read my review of How Will You Measure Your Life?) was widely known for “offering his own life as a case study.” • The Seattle Seahawks owner, Ken Behring (1928-2019), whose mother told him, “You better develop a personality. You are not going to make it on your looks.” • Catherine Hamlin (1924-2020) who, with her husband, medically treated more than 60,000 Ethiopian women over 61 years.  • In the chapter, “Fishers of Men,” Hagerty highlights the “life story” told by Ron and Al Lindner in their book “that doubles as a memoir and devotional.” The founders of In-Fisherman magazine (and more) note how AA and a revival meeting changed the trajectory of Ron Lindner’s life. • My favorite profile (with the author’s hints on how to ask questions) featured Ceinwen King-Smith, who spoke Chinese, Russian, French, and other languages. She made 23 trips to China. (Born in Chicago in 1945, her parents were ministers and she was blind. Absolutely stunning.) In the chapter, “How Pros Cover Their Own Stories,” you’ll love TV anchorman Mort Crim’s story, who started out as the “Teenage Evangelist” in his Church of God denomination. His God-given chutzpah scored him one-on-one meetings with Paul Harvey, Walter Cronkite, and KFC founder Harland Sanders. (He was the inspiration for the Will Ferrell Anchorman movies!) And how did it work out? “Crim discovered he didn’t need a church or a pulpit to give sermons.” No surprise, Hagerty’s writing is superb. While “Brother Alvah” strummed an electric guitar on a Midwest church tour, “…young Mort squeezed gospel sounds out of his accordion.” The author is working on his own obituary and will likely include his hitchhiking adventure in 1975. He describes the truck driver who gave him a ride: “He had 25 tons of cement in the back and a pack of cigarettes up front.”  Hagerty confesses that when he was based in Hong Kong, he was unprepared for his father’s death in 1997. See Chapter 19, “How We Failed My Father.” Today, however, he’s more than ready for his mother’s tribute. Back in 2012, at 85, she was still writing five columns a week for her local newspaper when she “went viral” worldwide with her review of the Olive Garden restaurant that had just opened in Grand Forks, N.D. The snickering response worldwide landed her on the front page of the WSJ. (Must-read!) In Hagerty’s pre-written newspaper version of his own obituary, his humor flows. He will include this: “I write obituaries,” he often said. “If you get a phone call from me, it probably isn’t a good sign.” To order from Amazon, click on the title for Yours Truly: An Obituary Writer's Guide to Telling Your Story, by James R. Hagerty. Listen on Libro (6 hours, 16 minutes). Read more about the book here. And listen to this podcast interview of the author here (43 minutes). YOUR WEEKLY STAFF MEETING QUESTIONS: 1) James R. Hagerty mentions a James Thurber book about Thurber's boss at the New Yorker, Harold Ross. Thurber shuns chronology, and “somehow it works.” Hagerty adds, “For those who don’t want to be shackled by chronology, Thurber produced a model of chaotic brilliance.” The chapter, “Inspiring Memoirs,” may sink my book budget—but the examples gave me permission to write my own story in my own voice. What’s the most inspiring memoir you’ve ever read—and why? 2) Gary Hoag was thinking way outside the batter’s box when he announced, “Play Ball!” on Oct. 21, 2022, at the memorial service for our mutual friend, Dan Busby (1941-2022). Dan, the former president of ECFA, was also a researcher, writer, and expert on the history of baseball tickets. Hoag blessed Busby’s family and friends by streaming the memorial service from the National Baseball Hall of Fame and Museum in Cooperstown, N.Y. So are you inspired and ready now to write your own obituary and life story (short or long)? Hagerty warns, “Don’t leave it to family members, who are almost certain to make a hash of it.”         Mastering 100 Must-Read Books Part 5: The Mount Rushmore of Leadership Legends (Ken Blanchard) Book #35 of 100: Fit at Last For your team meeting this week, inspire a team member to lead your “10 Minutes for Lifelong Learning” session by featuring Book #35 in Mastering 100 Must-Read Books.    Fit at Last:  Look and Feel Better Once and for All  by Ken Blanchard and Tim Kearin Books #22 through #40 spotlight 19 books I named to “The Mount Rushmore of Leadership Legends” group—featuring Patrick Lencioni, Jim Collins, Ken Blanchard, and Peter Drucker. Part 5 features five books by Blanchard, including this quick-reading and transparent get-fit motivational book by Blanchard and his coach. They reference a doctor’s question to a patient: “Would you rather exercise for 1 hour a day or be dead for 24 hours a day?”    • Read my review.    • Order from Amazon: Fit at Last    • Download the 100 Must-Read Books list (from John and Jason Pearson). AND SPEAKING OF OBITUARIES! When Ken Blanchard’s son noticed that his dad was “gimping around and looking a lot like Quasimodo from The Hunchback of Notre Dame,” Scott admonished him: “Dad, I’ve heard you kid around and say to Mom that when a tour bus unloads passengers at a hotel in Hawaii, 35 women will get off the bus and only 5 men, because the rest of the guys are dead.” This is a get-fit book like none you’ve ever read. Order now. Just do it!                      PEARPOD | TELLING YOUR STORY. Looking for a quick-and-easy “life story” option? Order THIS. 52 Ways to Share Your World With Those You Love, by Jason Pearson and Doug Fields. Beautifully designed as a tool (really a treasure) for parents and grandparents to think, write, and then pass along to each child or grandchild—you’ll be prompted to share meaningful messages on 52 topics in this fill-in-the-blanks journal. For more storytelling help, contact Jason Pearson at Pearpod (Design, Digital, Marketing, Social). Really! Include Mistakes in Your Obituary! The WSJ’s obituary writer (see above) urges you to include “lessons learned from your mistakes” in your obit. So maybe my obituary is already written? In 2021, with my wife’s encouragement, and my son’s help, I wrote Mastering Mistake Making: My 25 Memorable Mistakes—and What I Learned (10 Minutes for Lifelong Learning Workbook). Bob Lonac, CEO at CRISTA Ministries from 2006 to 2019, recommends this book in a two-minute video. View here. Order here. Read more here. “Chapter 2 is my favorite mistake,” says Lonac. MORE RESOURCES: • BLOG: Pails in Comparison • SUBSCRIBE: Your Weekly Staff Meeting eNews • JOHN'S BOOK REVIEWS: on Amazon  • WEBSITE:   Management Buckets • BLOG: Governance of Christ-Centered Organizations Father’s Day Gift Idea! Yes…it’s very funny, but also tragic. Read Feherty: The Remarkably Funny and Tragic Journey of Golf's David Feherty. Author John Feinstein writes, “Feherty’s concern wasn’t so much whether he could stay sober when working but whether he could be funny when he was sober.” (Note: When this golf book was published in May, it was immediately ranked #1 in “alcoholism recovery” on Amazon.) IMPORTANT NOTICE! Effective Oct. 1, 2025, all 657 eNews issues, previously archived on Typepad.com are slowly (!) being moved to a new website here. New book reviews will also be archived at John Pearson’s Buckets Blog. Or, click here for John’s recent book reviews on Amazon.

Culture Shock

 

Issue No. 562 of Your Weekly Staff Meeting  (June 2, 2023) offers a possible “Top-10” book for 2023 from Gallup. Warning! Employee disengagement impacts customers and cash! And this reminder: click here to download free resources from the 20 management buckets (core competencies). Leverage your team’s strengths with personalized coffee mugs! Gallup says employee engagement is the lowest in seven years. You can fix this!   Splitter or Blender: What’s Your Work Style? We once thought we were savvy leaders and managers—before COVID. We once thought that all team members working on-site was best—before COVID. We once thought that the five-day week was perfect—before COVID. BAD NEWS: Everything has changed and Bizarre World seems like the new normal. We all have strong opinions on what works in the workplace. GOOD NEWS: Gallup’s new book, Culture Shock (May 30, 2023), sets aside opinions and leverages their stunning research to propose seven “Recommendations for the New Workplace.” The book’s subtitle immediately teased me into the 30 short, but substantive chapters. From Gallup! CULTURE SHOCK:  An Unstoppable Force Has Changed How We Work and Live. Gallup's Solution to the Biggest Leadership Issue of Our Time by Jim Clifton and Jim Harter   What’s happening in this post-COVID era? The authors warn: • “Nothing is going back to normal. This is a moment of evolutionary change.” • “The danger is that a majority of employees will now operate more like independent contractors or gig workers than employees who are loyal and committed to your organization.” • “Employees are also now less likely to say that their organization delivers on its promises to customers.” • “Simply put, your employees and customers know each other. Many are best friends. All the good stuff in human nature and customers is at risk.” • “The real fallout isn’t here yet. The real fallout will come when the storm of declining employee engagement hits the customer.” There’s more bad news! “According to Gallup, a staggering 90% of U.S. employees with desk and office jobs aren’t longing for the old workplace to return. Only CEOs are.” And this: “…U.S. employee engagement has reached a seven-year low.” Co-author Jim Clifton is Gallup Chairman and co-author Jim Harter, Ph.D., is Gallup’s Chief Workplace Scientist. Research-based, their workplace insights are so, so important—if CEOs and managers will just stop and listen. Don’t skip this one from two insightful leaders. They’ve teamed up before to write It’s the Manager (read my review). And Clifton’s Born to Build, with Sangeeta Badal, Ph.D. (read my review), is a hopeful look at entrepreneurship.   TOP-10 BOOK. Culture Shock is already on my list of Top-10 Books of 2023. Someone on your team must read and report on this solution-filled path to our post-COVID dilemmas. Your employees and your customers will thank you. WHO KNEW? There will never be a return to “normal,” warn the authors. “Who knew that everyone in the whole world with an office or desk job could check into ‘Hotel Zoom International’ at the same time. A spectacular digital advancement for humankind came wrapped inside a global health catastrophe.” BRILLIANTLY PACKAGED into 30 single-topic chapters (about three pages each), the book runs just 158 pages, plus a robust appendix of another 100 pages, plus a tempting 20-page reference section. You’ll appreciate the deep research that helps you solve these pesky post-COVID issues: • Chapter 3: “The Business Problem.” The authors’ stunning opening: “You probably haven’t heard this: ‘Our employees and front-line managers control customer outcomes and daily cash flow more than any other single lever we can pull.’” • Chapter 4: “The Role Human Nature Plays in Business Outcomes.” Using the “Gallup Path®” graphic, the authors admonish: “Customer retention is the most critical metric on a CEO’s dashboard.” They add, “…your engaged employees create your engaged customers.” • Chapter 5: “The Most Important Habit of a Great Manager.” Why getting this wrong “is the root cause of burnout.” The habit? “One meaningful conversation per week with each team member.” CONFESSION! We all make mistakes and Gallup confesses this: “Over the years, Gallup missed asking why people who have desk jobs are required to travel miles from their home to sit in what is basically just a different chair. Like many things, we just assumed there was no better way.” So what’s the best way forward? In-person, work from home, or a hybrid model? Chapter 7 goes deeper on “Why the Commute?” and Chapter 8 delivers the latest surprising research on “Is In-Person Time That Valuable?” But two chapters jumped out at me: Chapter 10: “Splitters and Blenders: Two Different Relationships to Work.” Oh, my. I’ve built my management model around what I call “The 3 Powerful S’s: Strengths, Social Styles, and Spiritual Gifts.” Now…I’ll have to add a fourth “S” for “Splitters and Blenders!” A new question from Gallup: “In your best life imaginable, would you prefer a job that is 9 to 5 where work and life are separated, or one where work and life are more blended throughout the day?”  • “Splitters might work best at home or in the office but want to maintain a strict schedule of hours in each location.” • “Blenders might get their work done on weekends, evenings or early in the morning before the office opens.” But here’s the gut-check: • “Imagine managing someone and not knowing which type of employee they are.” • “Now imagine leading a team of people who don’t know who the splitters are and who the blenders are on the team.” And this is interesting: “Gen Z and young millennials are equally divided between splitters and blenders.” And “45% of working baby boomers prefer a work-life blend.” Plus, another warning! “Overall, blenders are more likely than splitters to be looking for another job (53% vs. 48% respectively). This presents a slightly greater challenge for retaining these employees.” Chapter 12: “Is the Four-Day Workweek a Good Idea?” Read the full chapter to understand the nuances for your organization, but note this: “Our data suggest that a four-day workweek may be advantageous for those who do not have the option to work remotely.” “THE REAL PROBLEM is that most employees are poorly managed.” In the U.S., almost seven in 10 employees are not engaged—or worse, disengaged—at work. “These people are spending their workday watching the clock, intentionally working against their employer or planning their escape—a symptom of an unhappy workplace.” ALERT! “If instead of shortening the workweek, employers focused on improving the quality of the work experience, they could nearly triple the positive influence on their employees’ lives.” There’s so much more here—so order this must-read book and discover… • …the six skill sets of great managers. “Managers account for 70% of the variance in team engagement.” (Chapter 27) • …why “only 21% of employees strongly agree that they trust the leadership of their organization.” • …what matters more than the number of days an employee is at the office. “…80% of employees who said they received meaningful feedback in the past week were fully engaged—regardless of how many days they worked in the office.” • …why (gulp!) “only 16% said that the last conversation with their manager was extremely meaningful.” (See Chapter 29, “One Meaningful Conversation With Each Employee per Week.”) • …the 7 Recommendations for the New Workplace. (See Part 5: “Gallup’s CEO Playbook.”) WEEKLY CHAT! Chapter 29, based on a study of 2,354 teams, “How to Make Meaningful Conversations a Weekly Habit,” will require that your managers are coached so they’ll become competent coaches. And by the way, does your organization have a certified CliftonStrengths coach? (Note: See my two-page form from the Meetings Bucket, “Weekly Update to My Supervisor,” which outlines how to have a meaningful weekly conversation—and includes reminders about “The 3 Powerful S’s” for both the manager and the direct report.)  ONE MORE. I gotta add this! On disengaged employees and the coming customer crisis, the authors warn that board members “don’t pay attention to this stuff because they can’t see the connection.” Example: When the chief human resources officer (CHRO) convinces the board that employee engagement is at 80%, then the board claps, “and the CHRO leaves with the board believing 80% of their employees are engaged.” (Rarely true!) Here’s why: BAMBOOZLED BOARDS! You must read why only 5s on a 1 to 5 scale (5 = strongly agree) should be counted. (Many HR surveys count the 4s also.) Example: How many team members would strongly agree (a 5) with this statement: “There is someone at work who encourages my development.” (See Chapter 3 for more engagement questions.) In addition to several brilliant examples on how the CliftonStrengths assessment keeps square pegs out of round holes (read about Jenny, Deepak, and Giselle), the authors give this startling stat: Just one in 10 managers have been trained on how to manage in a hybrid environment! And…don’t skip the fascinating short profiles on three strengths pioneers: Peter Drucker, Abraham Maslow, and Don Clifton.  I know…you have a lot of work ahead. To order from Amazon, click on the title for Culture Shock: An Unstoppable Force Has Changed How We Work and Live. Gallup's Solution to the Biggest Leadership Issue of Our Time, by Jim Clifton and Jim Harter. And thanks to Gallup Press for sending me a review copy. YOUR WEEKLY STAFF MEETING QUESTIONS: 1) Does your weekly staff meeting need to change? According to Culture Shock, “Among hybrid employees, 32% indicate that virtual meetings are less effective than in-person meetings, compared with 17% who say virtual meetings are more effective. More than half (51%) say there is no difference.” So…which meeting formats are working for us—and what’s not working? Do we know everyone’s preferred style: Splitters or Blenders? 2) The world is changing! Read this WSJ article by Alexandra Samuel, “How Retailers Should Start Catering to Hybrid-Working Customers. A lot of us no longer work 9 to 5, or commute into the office. Yet retail businesses seem stuck in a different era.” Then ask your team members: “Has our organization made any significant changes in our products, programs, or services—that relate to hybrid-working customers?”          Mastering 100 Must-Read Books Part 5: The Mount Rushmore of Leadership Legends (Ken Blanchard) Book #33 of 100: Leadership Smarts  For your team meeting this week, inspire a team member to lead your “10 Minutes for Lifelong Learning” session by featuring Book #33 in Mastering 100 Must-Read Books.    Leadership Smarts:  Inspiration and Wisdom from the Heart of a Leader by Ken Blanchard  Books #22 through #40 spotlight 19 books I named to “The Mount Rushmore of Leadership Legends” group—featuring Patrick Lencioni, Jim Collins, Ken Blanchard, and Peter Drucker. Part 5 features five books by Blanchard, including this tasty smorgasbord of leadership axioms and quotations.    • Read my review.    • Order from Amazon: Leadership Smarts    • Download the 100 Must-Read Books list (from John and Jason Pearson) Blanchard delivers a one-liner (in big type) on each left-hand page and his color commentary (in 100 words or less) on the right-hand page. I counted 75 “leadership smarts” from the mind of the chief spiritual officer of the Ken Blanchard Companies. Here’s some brain food: • “The key to developing people is to catch them doing something right.”  • “Things not worth doing are not worth doing well.”  • “Success is not forever and failure isn’t fatal.”  • “What motivates people is what motivates people.”  • “People with humility don’t think less of themselves, they just think of themselves less.”  This is fresh: • “Trying is just a noisy way of not doing something.” Blanchard adds, “Many people are interested rather than committed. They talk about trying to do something, rather than actually doing it. They make lots of noise, but fail to follow-up.” Just open this book to almost any page—and inspire your people: • “Vision is a lot more than putting a plaque on the wall. A real vision is lived, not framed.” • “A river without banks is a large puddle.” (Blanchard on boundaries.) • “All empowerment exists in the present moment.” • “The cure of too much to do is solitude and silence.”                     PEARPOD | TELLING YOUR STORY. Whoa! Ken Blanchard writes, “This is the first time in the history of business that you can be great at what you’re doing today and be out of business tomorrow.” Gallup warns about “culture shock” (see above). Are you resting on your laurels—or strategizing on the story you’ll be communicating next week and next month? We can help. Contact Jason Pearson at Pearpod (Design, Digital, Marketing, Social). Tent Cards & Tools for Leveraging Strengths Tool #20 in ECFA Tools and Templates for Effective Board Governance: Time-Saving Solutions for Your Board, by Dan Busby and John Pearson, includes suggestions on spotlighting the CliftonStrengths of your team members and board members. Just feature each person’s Top-5 strengths on a tent card (or a personalized coffee mug)—placed in front of each meeting participant. (My tent card reminds everyone that I want to stay FOCUSED!) Download Tool #20 here. Read more here. IMPORTANT NOTICE! Effective Oct. 1, 2025, all 657 eNews issues, previously archived on Typepad.com are slowly (!) being moved to a new website here. New book reviews will also be archived at John Pearson’s Buckets Blog. Or, click here for John’s recent book reviews on Amazon. Not Just for Spiritual Giants! Honest. You don’t have to be a spiritual giant to read this fascinating biography, but—warning—you will ask yourself, “Do I exhibit any signs of spirituality in my comfortable life?” Whew. Read my review of Count Zinzendorf and the Spirit of the Moravians, by Paul Wemmer.  MORE RESOURCES: • BLOG: Pails in Comparison • SUBSCRIBE: Your Weekly Staff Meeting eNews • JOHN'S BOOK REVIEWS: on Amazon  • WEBSITE:   Management Buckets • BLOG: Governance of Christ-Centered Organizations